The end of education is CHARACTER 

Last Saturday (08 April), I spoke at my alma mater during their moving up ceremony for Junior High and Recognition for Senior High and it was one of the happiest days of my life! I never imagined, not even in my wildest dreams that I will be invited to be a keynote speaker in any of my former schools. It was really fun to see familiar faces, most especially when I saw them listening carefully while I am standing in the podium. Due to my friends’ demands, I am publishing my speech here. Let me know what you think!


Thank you sir Chris for that warm and kind introduction.

The President and founder of Casa Del Nino Montessori Schools System Incorporated, Dr. Rosario G. Acierto. Ma’am

The Chairman of the Board of Trustees, Mr. Jose C. Acierto, Supervising Consultant, Dr. Corazon R. Asuncion, Administrators from Elementary and Junior High School, Ma’am Leigh Paguiligan and Sir Mel Bauit, The enthusiastic members of the teaching force and staff, The ever supportive parents, candidates for Junior High School completers, awardees, friends, ladies and gentlemen, good afternoon!

I’m very pleased to have been invited to speak here today at my Alma Mater, Casa Del Niño Montessori School. Today is a very special day for the Junior High School Completers, it’s also a very special day for the proud parents and grandparents, and also for the relieved teachers. Just wait until these students are graduating college. Then their parents will be therelieved ones.

Junior High School completers, you should know that your moms and dads are very proud of you today. They have high hopes for you, and they believe in you, and you are making them proud by showing what you can achieve.

Take a look at them now, and you can see them smiling and snapping photos so they can record this moment forever. Today is an important day for you and for them. Today they are very, very proud of you.

Today would be a good day to hug them and thank them for supporting you, because as much as this is your achievement, this is also the achievement of the people who care about you. That means your mom, your dad, your grandparents, your sisters and brothers, and all the other people who care about you. They want you to be at your best and to live up to your potential.

To all of today’s completers, I can’t imagine what’s going through your minds right now. Yet here I stand before you at this amazing crossroads of your life. So the question of the hour is what can I impart? How can I help you even in the slightest way to be ready for whatever comes next?

So I asked myself, how did I get here? After a lot of thought, I realized there have been two life lessons that changed everything about me. These were moments that shook me, scared me and humbled me. In the end, these moments are two big reasons I am here today. 

So let’s start with something I learned when I was at your age, noong highschool pa ako, noong nasa Casa Del Niño Montessori School pa ako, isang bagay na meron sa CASA na hindi ko makakalimutan at binitbit ko hanggang sa ako’y nag college, naging degree holder, naging professional, naging sa kung sino ako ngayon ang heartbeat ng eskwelahang ito:

The end of education is CHARACTER.

Who we are is more important than what we know. 

Martin Luther King Jr. once quoted about Character and education, he said that “ Intelligence plus Character – that is the goal of true education”.

Unfortunately, in our generation we oftentimes measure success in shallow and material ways: How much money do you have? How powerful are you? Are you famous? How big is your house? What kind of car do you drive? All these questions reinforce the misguided belief that success is somehow tied to material things that benefit the self. I have, I do, I am.

As a Casan, are we distinguished by our intelligence, looks, status or skills? No. I hope we casans are distinguished by our character, our hope, our faith, and our values. In the next chapter of your lives and in your future careers, how will you be distinguished? How will you be defined?

The same facts that are taught here at CDNMS are taught at other schools. Ag is the element symbol for Silver here as it is at INHS. Valentine’s Day still is recognized as happening on February 14, here at CDNMS as it is at SFC. If the facts are the same, what is it that makes you unique as Casan students?

Let me give you a glimpse of my High schoolYears, isa po kami sa batch na pinakamabait, db Tr. Mel. Isa kami sa batch na paborito ni Tr. Mel. Hahaha. Pero sino nga ba si Charmie nung high school siya, nung nasa Casa Del pa siya. isa po ako sa mga estudyante na tumatambay sa CR kapag inaantok sa klase, isa po ako sa estudyante na napatawag na sa principals office at isa po ako sa estudyanteng napalabas ng classroom dahil hindi gumawa ng assignment. Ngunit sa kabila po ng aming kalokohan, hindi ko po hinayaang mawala sa isip ko at sa puso ko ang katagang “The end of education is CHARACTER”.

Why did you come to CDNMS in the first place? Maybe because you wanted to be good in speech that taught by Tr. Melchor Bauit. Maybe because your friends are enrolled here or maybe because of the school facilities and a quality education that this school has to offer.

Whatever the reasons, I hope that you now know why you are a Casan and that you have been changed because of it.

I hope that you now know that secular knowledge does not clash with religious knowledge but rather enhances it. That our knowledge becomes a Wisdom when applied.

Today, I want to extend my deepest gratitude to my Alma Mater, CDNMS for teaching me that one of the heartbeat of success is CHARACTER. You can become the world’s most influential engineers and scientists yet also be the most humble. You can become the world’s most innovative artists, teachers, and lawyers yet also be the most kind. You can become the world’s most successful authors, businessmen, and doctors yet also be the most family oriented.

To become successful, you must be notable by your character, leadership, charity, kindness, honesty, and integrity. 

As Casans you have the unique responsibility and opportunity to be lights on a hill in this darkening world.

My second pivotal life lesson is, to become successful, you must have a vision. You have to DREAM BIG but START SMALL. 

Today, I want you to think about what you can do rather than what you cannot do. Think about the things you have as opposed to what you do not have.

What is in your hand right now is your diploma. You have to ask yourself, how will I use it to achieve my goals? And the answer to that depends on how far you can see.

You must have a vision for your future. You must pair that vision with a plan.

Create a vision based on your specific gifts, talents and tools. There is greatness in simply being you and using your skill to do something with your vision — and to put your personal plan in motion.

After having my Bachelor’s Degree in Nursing, I immediately took the Board Exam, as I’ve said earlier “YOU HAVE TO DREAM BIG”, and so my goal when I took my Board Exam is to top the Board, unfortunately I did not make it but thank God, I passed my board. And finally, I became a full-Pledged nurse, my mom and dad wants me to go abroad, well it was also my dream to work abroad but things didn’t go as planned.

After working at the Hospital and after being a Community Health Nurse, I didn’t feel the sense of fulfillment. I was searching for something that I knew I was created for. I was searching for things that I’m passionate about. And guess what, I chose to be in the business industry, not that because this is what I’m passionate about or because I want to earn money but because I used this as an excuse to my parents para po hindi sila magalit sa akin, an excuse to fulfill the calling God has for me. 

I found my calling. I found something that really satisfies my soul. And this is what I’m passionate about. For me, having God and serving God is much more than the diploma, the license, the wealth, and the things I have now. I may not be in the Hospital curing physical illness and diseases but I’m called to heal what’s inside, THE HEART! To inspire, to touch the lives of people by sharing my life testimony on how God changed my life, by telling them that God loves them and that God has a greater plan for them. For me this is LIFE all about, this is how I view SUCCESS, and for me this is worth to die for.

Even if our plans and goals do not pan out exactly how we have envisioned them, we will still benefit from having that vision.

As you go forth to the next chapter of your lives, para sa sabay-sabay na hakbang tungo sa maunlad na kinabukasan, guys, huwag niyong kalimutang bitbitin ang heartbeat ng eskwelahang ito, that “THE END OF EDUCATION IS CHARACTER, remember that who we are is more important than what we know; second, you must have a vision, you’ve got to dream big and start small, you’ve got to find your PASSION.

I’ll leave you with this final word, from a great author with whom I imagine you are all familar, by the name of our Father in Heaven, God

“For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord. “Plans to proper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.”

So congratulations to all of the Junior High School completers and achievers, congratulations to the parents, and finally, congrats to the teachers and everyone else who helped our graduates reach here today.

Now I know why I got invited here. Because I am a proud product of this SCHOOL. It’s good to be back home. I am proud to say “TATAK CASAN AKO”. 

Wherever every Casan will go and reach, whatever endeavor we might pursue, achievement and success we will attain, let me say that CDNMS will always be a very special part of our being. We are after all CASAN in heart.

Congratulations again, and thank you for your attention.

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Till we meet again. 

Honestly, I never imagined us being best friends. I find you annoying and I hated you and liked you at the same time. But now, time has changed. We’ve been friends for such a long long time and it’ll be fun to fool around with my ex-best slash boy friend. 

We have dreamed together. Laughed together. Whenever I needed your comfort and strength, your level-headedness and rationality, you were always there for me. Our relationship has gone through a lot of things ranging from the serious up to the stupid and we were able to weather the storms together, you and I mainly because we knew how to properly steer the relationship back to its proper course.

I’m really happy I’d get to know you more, better and deeper. 

You’re the one who knows me inside and out. You know my thoughts, expressions and meaning behind my body language. Even in silence you know what I feel. 

Despite the things you didn’t understand about me, you supported me in everything. Encouraged me when I needed encouragement, congratulated me when I did well, and told me to do better when I did poorly. You always believed that I can do better and be better. Thank you!

And at times when I became ill, depressed, or had problems, you knew what to say. And even when you didn’t, you comforted me and assured me that things will get better. Thank you!

At the same time you have managed to keep my feet on the ground, always reminding me that my life is my own and no one else’s. I thank you for that. You taught me how fully comprehend what real love is like without even telling me you loved me. Just by showing me in your own way, you made me see how two incompatible persons can actually become real friends and true lovers. 

You know we’ve spent so much of our lives together and I’ve always felt that those years of my life will never leave me…all the things we’ve shared will be in my heart as long as I live.

Thank you so much for the friendship. This I will treasure ‘til the end. I’m excited to get to know you more and more as the day goes by. May we have more adventures to share, memories to create, embarrassing secrets to tell and lessons to learn together 🙂

I have never met somebody I connect with as much as we do. In our own weird ways, we are so different and yet we are also so alike.

You have made me very happy just by sharing yourself and your life with me. The memories will stay in my heart forever. From the time we first started going out until now.

I thank God for being at the center of this beautiful friendship. He makes it more amazing. May we never get tired of pushing one another in reaching our goals in life through His guidance. 

I am fairly sure our paths will continue to meet. Maybe someday I’ll be more mature and better prepared for whatever comes my way.

And when our paths meet again, we would both be ready for whatever it is that we were really meant to be…friends, lovers, husband and wife…we’ll see….only God can tell…..

Photo credits: Quote Catalog

Paano dumiskarte ang kristiyanong lalake? 🕵


Minsan maihahalintulad mo siya sa larong chess. 🕴🕴🕴 Oo, sa chess nga. 

Ang kagandahan kasi sa larong chess puwede siya sa beginner (NOVICE) at siyempre sa mga pro (CHESS MASTER). 

Ngayon, naranasan mo na bang matalo sa larong chess??? Kasi, WRONG MOVE ka?? 

Napapansin ko lang sa mga chess master, bawat move nila pinag iisipan at pinag aaralan nila. They do not usually move lang ng move, bara lang ng bara, tira lang ng tira…but for the novice, halla! Sige, move lang ng move. Maenjoy lang ang laro. Win or lose. No big deal!!

Para sa NOVICE

Kapag dumiskarte ng babae parang machinegun….baril lang ng baril, kung ilan ang matamaan, sayo na!! 

Kung sa chess, ikaw yung madalas macheckmate. Kasi hindi mo pinag iisipan at pinagplaplanuhan yung bawat move mo. Madalas ka ma-wrong move! 🙊 Kaya ang ending mo, madalas kang nasasaktan. Madalas ka natturn down. Madalas kang nahohopia. Madalas, PLAY AGAIN!! 

Para sa CHESS MASTER

Kung pumili ka para kang sniper! Matindi ka e! Kasi kung mamili ka, ang target mo ISA LANG!! 

Tapos talaga namang you really invest your time and effort into it, kasi gusto mo bullseye e. Planado ka! Plantsado ka! Pinag isipan mo! Pinagplanuhan mo! Matindi ka dumiskarte! Sa kagaya mo, isang game lang sapat na…kasi siguradong panalo ka. Ikaw yung slowly but surely. Di ka naiinip sa tagal ng laro kasi alam mo sa huli, it’s worth it!! 

Ang chessmaster (tunay na lalake) slowly but surely! Isang game lang sapat na, kasi pinag aralan mo, pinagplanuhan mo, alam mo ang ending nun, PANALO KA!!

Sa henerasyon kasi natin ngayon parang ang batayan ng pagiging tunay na lalake ay kung nakailang girlfriends ka na, kung ilang babae na ang napaiyak mo, ang napaasa mo, ang naghahabol sayo, ang nagkakagusto sayo o di naman kaya kung ilang likes meron ka sa fb, kung ilan ang followers mo…kaya pati mga lalake ngayon adik sa selfie, gusto maging famous, gusto makilala, gusto maging sikat kasi pakiramdam nila dun nila mararanasan ang fulfillment ng buhay.

Everyone who drinks of this water will be thirsty again…. John 4:13


Sa totoo lang ang fulfillment ng buhay wala naman sa tao, sa position, sa power, sa lovelife, sa kung ano man ang meron ka. 

Ang totoong fulfillment ng buhay matatagpuan lang yan kay Lord. 

….but whoever drinks of the water that I will give him will never be thirsty again. The water that I will give him will become in him a spring of water welling up to eternal life. John 4:14

Yung love na hindi mo maikukupara sa kahit na anong love na naranasan mo sa mga naging gfs mo, kafling mo, kaibigan mo o sa pamilya mo kasi yung love ng Lord nakakapagbago ng buhay, ng pananaw, nakakapagbigay ng bagong simula.  Yung saya na ni minsan hindi mo pa naranasan sa buhay mo. Yung contentment na akala mo hindi magiging posibleng mangyari sa buhay mo.

Ang tunay na lalake si Lord ang one great love. 

Kay Lord tumatakbo kapag may temptation, kay Lord nagsseek ng advice, kay Lord humihingi ng final decision, kay Lord lumalapit sa tuwing nadadapa, kay Lord nagpapaayos, kay Lord nagpapakilatis ng babaeng gugustuhin niya, kay Lord nagsasabi ng problema.

Ang tunay na lalake marunong manalangin, marunong magbasa ng bible, marunong magpakumbaba, marunong humingi ng tawad, marunong rumespeto, marunong magpahalaga ng mga bagay na meron siya.

It’s never too late to start again. Nadapa ka man o nafeel mo man na madami ka ng oras na nasayang sa paglalaro sa buhay, may pagkakataon ka pa namang magbago. God is a God of many chances. Ang kilala kong tunay na lalake marunong mag repent at handang magpaayos sa Lord. 😊☺️

And the Lord will guide you continually and satisfy your desire in scorched places and make your bones strong; and you shall be like a watered garden, like a spring of water, whose waters do not fail. Isaiah 58:11

Paano mag-antay ang Kristiyanong Babae?

  
Sa totoo lang isa sa pinakamahirap gawin ng isang tao ay ang MAGHINTAY!!! Kahit anong klaseng pag aantay pa yan, pare-pareho lang ng pakiramdam…NAKAKAINIP, NAKAKABAGOT, NAKAKAPAGOD, NAKAKALUNGKOT, NAKAKADISAPPOINT, lahat ng NAKAKA na mahuhugot mo ngayon sa kaibuturan ng puso mo, yon na yon!! HAHAHA.

Pero….PAANO NGA BA MAG-ANTAY ANG KRISTIYANONG BABAE? 🙆💆💇

Sila yung mahilig mag FRIENDZONE!!!!! 

What??? Why??? How???

1. FRIENDZONE yourSELF

For no one has ever hated his own body, but he nourishes and tenderly cares for it, as the Messiah does the church. Ephesians 5:29

Meaning, mahalin mo muna ang sarili mo, you have to be happy with your own company first. You have to respect yourself first, YOU HAVE TO MATURE FIRST!! 

You cannot give what you do not have.

Kailangan BUO KA! Mahalaga din na dapat alam mo ang WORTH at ang VALUE mo ng sa ganon alam mong alagaan at respetuhin ang sarili mo. 

2. FRIENDZONE your FAMILY

Honor your father and your mother, that your days may be long in the land that the Lord your God is giving you. Exodus 20:12

Be friend with your mom and dad and your siblings. Date them. Spend quality time with them. Sila naman muna. 

Bago ka makipag date sa crush mo, idate mo muna mga magulang mo.

Training begins at home!

3. FRIENDZONE your FRIENDS

Get a life!! Enjoy your life!! While you are still young, single and free, go out with your friends. BUT, please choose your friends.

Do not be deceived: bad company ruins good morals. 1 Corinthians 15:33

I don’t mean to say na layuan mo ang BI friends mo, I guess kailangan ka nila, make a difference to them. Sila ang mahawa mo, hindi ikaw ang mahawa sknla. Don’t pressure them to change, hayaan mo na ang pagbabago makita sayo. 

4. FRIENDZONE GOD

Ito pinakamahalaga sa lahat. Ang kaibiganin mo si Lord. Yung kaibigan na hindi lang basta kaibigan kundi iBESTFRIEND ZONE mo. 😊 Unahin mo si Lord sa lahat ng bagay. 

Seek first the Kingdom of God and His righteousness, and ALL THESE THINGS WILL BE ADDED UNTO YOU. Matthew 6:33

Iba kapag same kayo ng heartbeat ng Lord. Alam mong secured ka, secured ang future mo. 

He promised us the BEST FUTURE: best job, best boyfriend, BEST FUTURE!!!

Kaya naman wag kang magmadali, MAG-ANTAY KA! ☺️ May nag aantay na the best para sayo. Focus ka muna sa Lord. Maximize your singleness to know God and serve God! 

5. FRIENDZONE your PARTNER

Take it slow. Kapag may napupusuan ka na wag ka naman agad agad magpapakita ng motibo. Mahalaga ding kilalanin mo muna. Mas okay yung friendship na pure ang intention. Iba pa din ang relationship na nagsimula sa friendship. 

Kung may nagugustuhan ka na kagaya ng lagi kong sinasabi, TAKBO KA SA LORD. ☺️ Pray! Pray! Pray! 

Two are better off than one, for they can help each other succeed. If one person falls, the other can reach out and help. Ecclesiastes 4:9-10

Respect eachother, pray for eachother, build up one another, support one another. 

The Lord is good to those who wait for him, to the soul who seeks him. Lamentations 3:25


PS

I’d love to hear from you lalo na po sa mga gentlemen na nakakabasa nito. I’m planning to write again kung paano naman manligaw ang kristiyanong lalake. So guys, I’d love to hear a word from you. Please feel free to message me! God bless! 

REAL LOVE IS A CHOICE 💕

Hi. 🙋 Ako nga pala ang future wife mo. 🙋👰👸 Kilala mo na ba ako? Siguro kung isa ka sa mga kaibigan ko malamang sinasabi mo na ngayon, “Nako, wag yang si Charm. Ang taas ng standards niyan. Di ako pasado.” Alam mo, tama ka! Hehehe. Tama ka sa oo mataas ang standards ko. May standards akong sinusunod sa buhay ko. Sabi ko sa Lord, “Lord, ito yung mga gusto ko sa isang lalake ha. Tapos ganito, tapos ganyan.” Kasi ang inisip ko, God’s best nga db? Kaya alam mo ineexpect ko na ikaw yung lalake na mam-meet mo yung standards ko. Kasi sabi ko, LOVE IS A CHOICE….so bakit ko pipiliing mahalin yung lalakeng di naman pasado sa standards ko. 

Tapos isang araw nagising ako sa tanong na, “Anak, anong mas mahalaga sayo, standards mo o kagustuhan kong mangyari sa buhay mo?” Binalikan ko yung mga prinsipyo ko. Ang daming tinuro sa akin ni Lord. Hindi sa binabalewala ko na ang standards ko pero ngayon, mas mahalaga sa akin na mahal kita at tanggap ko kung sino ka. Lahat tayo nasa proseso pa. At habang wala ka pa sa buhay ko, pinagdarasal ko na i-mold ka din ng Lord to be the person He wants you to be not the person I want you to be. Sorry ha. Kaya kung tatanungin mo ako ngayon kung ano ang ibig sabihin ng LOVE IS A CHOICE…pinaintindi sa akin ng Lord na piliin mong mahalin yung lalakeng pipiliin mo pa ding mahalin siya despite of his past, despite of his flaws, despite of his weaknesses..handa mo siyang yakapin, handa mong sabihing hindi kita iiwan..db ako ang suitable partner na ibinigay ng Lord sayo? Magtutulungan tayo. Nandito lang ako para sayo.

Then I began to see the good side in a person. Dati kasi kung ikaw yung tao na di papasa sa standards ko pasensiyahan tayo, di kita magugustuhan, pero ngayon iba na, mahalaga ang love. Mahalaga ang pag-ibig na galing sa Diyos. Yung pag-ibig na hindi ako ang magbabago sayo kundi yung pag-ibig ng Lord ang magbabago ng buhay mo. Sabi nga sa word, “there is no fear in love. Perfect love cast out fear.” And we all know that perfect love only comes from the Lord. Kaya I pray na sana punuin ka ng Lord ng pagmamahal niya, kasi God’s love transforms heart. Saka para magkaroon ka na din ng tapang. HAHAHA. Ng lakas ng loob. HAHAHA. Huwag kang mapressure sa checklist ko. Haha. Standards ko lang yun. Ang mahalaga sa akin yung mamahalin kita at tatanggapin kita dahil alam ko ikaw yung bigay ng Lord sa akin. 😊 Sabi nga nila, real love is an unconditional commitment to an imperfect person. Yan ang gusto kong maramdaman at kapag yan naramdaman ko, masasabi kong IKAW NA!! 

Your suitable partner,

Charmie Mei Paredes 💕
PS: Para sa mga kagaya ko na may ipinaglalabang standards, not to lower down our standards but we are just choosing love, trust and forgiveness over OUR OWN THING CALLED “STANDARDS” Mind you, it took me months to totally accept and embrace the real meaning of REAL LOVE

You don’t choose who you’re attracted to, but you definitely choose who you fall in love with and (more importantly) who you stay in love with.

It is a choice to see the good in a person every day, rather than focusing on the negative things that bother us. We have to accept them and love them as they are. If we go into a relationship thinking we can change someone, we are setting our relationship and ourselves up to fail. We all have flaws and quirks and are weird in some ways. Accepting those differences is part of love.

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. 1 Corinthians 13:4-7

#RevelationFromGod #RealLoveIsAChoice #UnfailingLove 

Mount Pulag

   Di ko maiwasang hindi ipost to. Gusto ko lang magkuwento. Gusto ko lang maglabas ng saloobin ko. 😊

Sobrang amazed ako sa goodness ni Lord. Bago pa kami umakyat may warning na ang pag-asa sa bagyo though di naman affected ang benguet or somewhere dito sa norte pero sabi nila, iba daw kasi sa bundok, kahit maaraw sa baba, sa bundok bumabagyo na pala. Yung ibang team na umakyat bago kami, mga a week before kami, hanggang camp 2 lang sila, di sila nakatungtong ng summit kasi bumabagyo daw sa taas pero yung sa amin grabe!!!! Sobrang ganda ng weather. Sa totoo lang nung una di ko naappreciate kasi nabitin ako sa sea of clouds tapos sobrang hirap ng trail, almost 11hours na lakad parang gusto ko na lang sumuko pero ang iniisip ko yung summit, yung dahilan ng pag akyat ko kaya natapos ko, I reached the top. 🚩 Sobrang saya ko, yung pakiramdam na “wow!!!! Nakaya ko!!!” 11hours trekking tapos yung damit ko 4 na patong sa taas, 4 na patong sa baba, 3 patong na medyas kasi sobrang lamig daw sa taas, sobra nga!!! Haha.

Yung disappointment ko napalitan ng amazement!!! Iba talaga gumalaw si Lord para sobra mong ma-appreciate yung goodness niya. Pag kauwi namin saka bumagyo, saka umulan, saka pumangit yung weather. Ngayon sobra akong amazed. Yung pakiramdam na naman na ang spoiled ko sknya. Iba ka talaga Lord. Ang galing galing galing mo!!! 
Dahil sa pag akyat ko, madami akong natutunan, madami din akong realizations, bumaba ako na may bitbit na excitement kasi alam ko pag uwi ko ng Ilagan may panibagong testimony na naman akong maish-share sa mga kabataang may pangarap sa buhay, may pinagdadaanan sa buhay, gusto ng tagumpay, natitisod, gusto umusad, nawawala, nahihirapan pero lumalaban. 

I have kept the good fight, I have finished the race, I have kept the faith. 2 Timothy 4:7

sa tamang panahon

  

Father, my heart is fragile and delicate and easily broken. I have tried to find the one who will cherish me, whithout Your view. My heart has been broken and my emotions bruised. I ask You to take and guard my heart. I will choose not to entertain thoughts and emotions of love which cause me to give my heart away too readily. I will come quickly to You when I start feeling like I am in love. Please hold the key to my heart and emotions until a day I can give it to the man You have prepared for me.”

This prayer comes from a woman whose story is in the book “Lady in Waiting.” I share this with you today because I think this woman has the right view on dating. She has recognized that her heart is weak and fragile.  

We too should know this- look at how quickly we attach ourselves to guys, how many texts from a guy does it take to make your heart beat fast when you receive one? How often do you catch yourself daydreaming about a guy? And on the other side, how bad does it hurt when you get rejected, how often do guys break your heart? 

The answer to these questions will quickly show you how fragile your heart is. Dating is a game of giving pieces of your heart away and never getting them back. The more you date and become attached to people, the more of your heart you give away.

That is why this woman, and many others (including myself) have figured out the best way to save your whole heart for the man of your dreams is to wait

How do you wait? You give your whole entire heart to God and everything that goes with it. Tell God he can have it completely. He is the only one who really knows who your husband will ultimately be anyways, so why not wait for his discrection to give your heart out?

Giving God control of your heart is not easy though, it requires much trust, patience, and discipline. Notice in the prayer she said she would quickly come to God whenever she felt feelings for a guy. She says this because she knows the heart is easily mislead (Proverbs 16:2) By constantly checking emotions and feelings with God’s will she is keeping God in control and allowing him to protect her heart.

Since, then, you have been raised with Christ, set your hearts on things above, where Christ is, seated at the right hand of God. Set your minds on things above, not on earthly things. For you died, and your life is now hidden with Christ in God.” Collossians 3:1-3 

What does this look like in real life? Well, first you need to have a long talk with God, sharing with Him this commitment and allowing Him to fully take over your heart.

Then, the next time you start to get feelings for a guy, before you can entertain the thought or text your best friend, you immediately go to God and ask him if this is someone he wants you to be with. 

Check your list of standards, does this guy seem like he might even come close? (The excuse: “I don’t know him yet” does not count here. If you noticed who the guy was you have obviously noticed some of his behavior or speech. It is not hard to tell right off the bat what a person’s heart is. 

If you have a close relationship with God you can easily distinguish if someone is living with God as the center of their life or not.

Next, pray that God’s will would be done and not yours, and mean it! Allow God to be in control of the situation—don’t Facebook stalk the guy, don’t “accidently” get his number from a friend—just stop. Relax, wait. Let God handle what you have already asked him to handle.

After you have brought everything under God’s control, then you have to focus your thoughts on God or else we all know they will be focused on this guy. So pick a verse to memorize or a prayer to pray, anything that can remind you to bounce your thoughts upward. I know all these steps may seem hard and overwhelming, but God has a special person designed for each and every one of you and He doesn’t want you to give your heart away until He shows you the perfect guy He has for you in His perfect time.

So give your heart to God first, and trust Him to give it away to your husband in His time. Try it and see what happens. 

Above ALL else guard your heart, for it is the wellspring of life.” Proverbs 4:23